I'm not even sure if you really like me.
Some things I cannot change, I finally understand the serenity prayer.
After days if feeling awful, stressed, restless.. It seems I'm catching a bit of a break.
I don't know what'll happen, the thought of losing you scares me, endlessly.
I'm so obsessive.
I obsess about everything.
And I can't even enjoy sometimes, even when I'm enjoying.
I want to let go, let God... But I'm unsure of how to do that when so much is on my plate, and I'm being beckoned to act and do constantly.
I wanna be the slutty girl in the bedroom, I believe that's the girl of a mans dreams.
And I am free in that regard, I am slutty and surly and sultry.
My dream is to have my own place, or have a roommate, get the fuck outta my parents house.
I wonder if God cares about my dream.
I really want a good paying job, fucking sucks that I can't find decent work with a college education.
I guess I've stopped writing poetry in here for now, can't find it in my right now.
Maybe ill try today, maybe ill pull something good outta me.
I just want it to be fall already, and summer hasn't technically even started.
I'm hating the heat already.
The long long fucking days with nothing to do but wait for you.
Fuck.
Going to therapy session this morn.
Maybe things will start looking up soon.
When the rain..
When the rain..